Violet Equitable Faith
It's a bit bright, I know. I'm still working on the background and all. I just needed it to look different from last year to begin with.
So every year I re-decorate in time for Jan 1st. This year, I simply didn't feel up to it. In fact it's on a bit of an impulse that I've redecorated right now & am typing here today.
Formalities first.
Anyone who knows me knows I love purple & her shades, & there's something about violet, particularly, that's strong, feminine, unexpected & resilient. I want that for myself this year. If there's an expectation I don't want to conform to, I want the independence & strength for myself to go against it; if there's a stereotype that I can accept for myself, I want to be able to live with that choice with clear conscience & belief.
Equity has always, for me, been the innate choice between right & wrong. Equity is moralistic & indiscriminate, subjectively objective & objectively subjective, based on instinct & the deciding factor in an equal risk scenario. It is the do-unto-others-as-you-would-have-others-do-to-you-even-if-others-would-not-so-do that I want to hold onto in my mind. I know that it is equitableness that will soothe my soul in times to come.
Faith is the cornerstone for me. I must believe in myself, in others, in humanity, in the way of the Universe & in Higher Powers. Faith will be the reason to wake up to many tomorrows, and cyclically enough, that there will be many tomorrows to wake up to & experience will bolster that faith. To begin with though, I need faith that persistent faith can work wonders.
It is thus, that I have, this year, Violet Equitable Faith.
Now that the formalities are out of the way, I can move on to the catch-up session.
The last time I wrote, it was nine months ago. Quite an amount has changed since then.
I'm now effectively done with legal studies & am serving out my traineeship period in a fantastic firm. I love my work, & hope to stay on with the firm after the traineeship. There's another change, it's no longer a 'pupillage'; it's a 'training contract'. More importantly, I will be called to the Bar in May this year & shall properly don the robes I've been waiting six years for. I've known for 3 weeks or so now, and I'm still mighty thrilled about it!
Family & The Constants are well. They've become so much more my world. Naturally, it takes something difficult to show how important, sincere & valuable some people are, & when my difficult time came, these are the people who stood by me & brought me out the other side. For that, & so many countless other times, I will be eternally grateful.
On a personal note, the Fellow is now the Ex-Fellow. That things turned out as such, I've come to terms with, but the manner & timing are things that I'm not about to forgive him for. Not just yet anyway. I am thankful though that the weight of things as they turned out, are not the burden of my conscience. My conscience is clear & I am happy still. Right now, that's all that matters to me.
As for miscellaneous matters, I eat better these days, I sleep deep, I make some effort to exercise. I laugh a lot, I sing to myself, I don't care about how much of a fool I look like to other as long as I'm happy, not hurting anyone else & have a clear conscience. I love the people I do endlessly, I try to help at least one person everyday, I smile at people when I notice they're looking at me on the train & think of at least one thing I'm thankful for the day for before I fall asleep each night.
I think I'm doing pretty well for myself overall. I'm quite pleased.
So every year I re-decorate in time for Jan 1st. This year, I simply didn't feel up to it. In fact it's on a bit of an impulse that I've redecorated right now & am typing here today.
Formalities first.
Anyone who knows me knows I love purple & her shades, & there's something about violet, particularly, that's strong, feminine, unexpected & resilient. I want that for myself this year. If there's an expectation I don't want to conform to, I want the independence & strength for myself to go against it; if there's a stereotype that I can accept for myself, I want to be able to live with that choice with clear conscience & belief.
Equity has always, for me, been the innate choice between right & wrong. Equity is moralistic & indiscriminate, subjectively objective & objectively subjective, based on instinct & the deciding factor in an equal risk scenario. It is the do-unto-others-as-you-would-have-others-do-to-you-even-if-others-would-not-so-do that I want to hold onto in my mind. I know that it is equitableness that will soothe my soul in times to come.
Faith is the cornerstone for me. I must believe in myself, in others, in humanity, in the way of the Universe & in Higher Powers. Faith will be the reason to wake up to many tomorrows, and cyclically enough, that there will be many tomorrows to wake up to & experience will bolster that faith. To begin with though, I need faith that persistent faith can work wonders.
It is thus, that I have, this year, Violet Equitable Faith.
Now that the formalities are out of the way, I can move on to the catch-up session.
The last time I wrote, it was nine months ago. Quite an amount has changed since then.
I'm now effectively done with legal studies & am serving out my traineeship period in a fantastic firm. I love my work, & hope to stay on with the firm after the traineeship. There's another change, it's no longer a 'pupillage'; it's a 'training contract'. More importantly, I will be called to the Bar in May this year & shall properly don the robes I've been waiting six years for. I've known for 3 weeks or so now, and I'm still mighty thrilled about it!
Family & The Constants are well. They've become so much more my world. Naturally, it takes something difficult to show how important, sincere & valuable some people are, & when my difficult time came, these are the people who stood by me & brought me out the other side. For that, & so many countless other times, I will be eternally grateful.
On a personal note, the Fellow is now the Ex-Fellow. That things turned out as such, I've come to terms with, but the manner & timing are things that I'm not about to forgive him for. Not just yet anyway. I am thankful though that the weight of things as they turned out, are not the burden of my conscience. My conscience is clear & I am happy still. Right now, that's all that matters to me.
As for miscellaneous matters, I eat better these days, I sleep deep, I make some effort to exercise. I laugh a lot, I sing to myself, I don't care about how much of a fool I look like to other as long as I'm happy, not hurting anyone else & have a clear conscience. I love the people I do endlessly, I try to help at least one person everyday, I smile at people when I notice they're looking at me on the train & think of at least one thing I'm thankful for the day for before I fall asleep each night.
I think I'm doing pretty well for myself overall. I'm quite pleased.
4 remarks:
:) good on you, babe.
*hug*
Welcome back baby. :) *hugs and kisses*
Thank you both darlings! *Hugs all around!"
Post a Comment